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Wish upon a star
title: WHAT IS THIS?!
date: 18 August 2009

I have no idea what I am feeling now. D: Seriously feel like "sleeping" early, cry silently in the dark.

I mean, I can't blame unfairness or whoever who cause me to be like this. In the first place, why even give me hope and in the end tell me its nothing.

Giving me hope that my graded stuff are doing well, telling me that its possible to do this, and now you tell me that everything is a stupid mistake and its nothing at all.

Firstly, attacked me with my oh so sucky math marks. Tell me that I almost fail. What is this? I know how do the questions okay. Give me hope, tell me I can do it with those A and above grades for assignments, few days before the test, tell me I am alright with my algebra and everything. And give me such a low marks for commontest. A+ to C. What is this?

But who can I blame? Is not like I study like how I did for my geog. But I tried studying is just that I have no idea how. And give me such sucky results. What is this? I paid attention in class, not like slacking away, doing nothing.

The first attack already good enough. Not yet. The best have yet to come

Tell us that we didn't get in to the finals. What? We made everyone laugh, why no? We made it like a story telling competition and they say no, it looks like role play. Wth. Isn't story telling part of role playing, where you have different characters acting out? What is this? If I haven't been strong enough, I think Im gonna cry in class. First math, now this. How good.

Its not over yet. Hcl results is no much better. From an A+ for CT2 to a C. What is this lah! Who to blame? I mean, its true that I didn't study for this. What is there to study? But why give me such terrible results when there are people scoring as high like what. Forget it. Just blame the paper like how I always do.

The whole lesson, or rather from the start of the day, my mood wasn't really good. Morning was sort of emoing, feeling so sleepy at the same time. Afternoon, after recess, was feeling alittle better during science. Right after science, came all the dumb results. During jap, was emoing alittle and abit quiter than usual.

The very last time I ever feel like this - that the world is so damn unfair -was like the starting of this term when I know I must buck up and I tried my best to do so. Middle of the term, was quite satisfied with results and everything and was the nomal self. And now, I think its kind of back to square one. The feeling is like the end of sem1 when I seriously cried in bed at night, trying to control myself but I couldn't. But I realise that its better to cry alone than to cry in class. Stupid.

When typing this post, my eyes are teary. Tried holding those tears back as I don't want my parents to know. In the mass conver, wasn't laughing even though I was talking to Shandon/JiaJin. Nothing right seems to be happening today. And right now, I literally eff everything silently.

And everything ends.. without a happy ending...

这一切为什么总那么的短占...

neorago ♥ @ 9:18 PM
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